Webster turned its back on LGBTQ+ people

Webster’s new supervisor supported the raising of a small flag below the American flag outside the Webster town hall. Some community members became so angry they asked the town board to vote on the matter.

Of those willing to show up to a town board meeting, the majority actually spoke in favor of keeping the flag up. The board voted to take it down anyway.

This series of events is unsurprising to the LGBTQ+ community, though some allies have expressed shock to me that it occurred in Rochester or New York State at all.

Putting aside the assumed political homogenization of any state, it is worth acknowledging that the State Assembly was Republican controlled a mere 8 years ago, Monroe County’s current Democratic executive is an anomaly after decades of GOP control and the legislature is often on tenuous footing in terms of control.

While party control of a locality should not make it obvious if there is LGBTQ+ support and GOP support for queer people has been growing (the last few months excluded), Democrats still overwhelmingly provide better conditions than Republicans which helps to illuminate why, even after a supposed Democratic wave in 2025 locally, some of these new politicians have not been overly ambitious and incumbents of many years remaining on our councils leave many of us wary.

Some people went away in their LGBTQ+ advocacy when gay marriage was legalized, but that was never an end goal of the movement and the bullying and hate in our schools—yes even here in New York—did not just disappear. Sadly, in some cases it has even gotten worse.

While Webster’s town motto has long been derided and represents a pretention demonstrating the difference in wealth between the eastern and western suburbs and both of them relative to the city of Rochester, this vote makes clear some in the community—particularly some with power—believe life is only worth living for some.

I wholeheartedly disagree and tell every person out there who may see this action—one I hesitated giving oxygen to—you do matter and are worth living. From the towns of Monroe County to Wyoming and Ontario counties to states and communities outside New York and the U.S., young and old, if you ever doubt it, know you are loved and your identity—even if you are in the midst of questioning it—is valid.

Other communities in our area also don’t fly the pride flag and politicians have gotten away without having to take a vote (looking at you Gates and Greece), but Webster’s allows us to at least raise these concerns. A choice was publicly made.

Any given depiction of pride or a rainbow is not merely recognition or welcome but an indication to someone struggling that things might be alright and others are out there, that a patient or student can be truly open without fear of retaliation or a change in the care they are offered, that for, maybe just a moment, you can breathe and take off the mask.

Anti-discrimination laws are important, but there is a limit to their efficacy. I have had doctors tell me they did not believe someone could be gay. I have had others who proudly wore pronoun pins. I noticed not just a difference in care, but a difference in my own trust in the healthcare system and my ability and willingness to advocate for myself when needed.

I have been formally out to some people for 9 years and more or less the world for 6, but every day that I have an interaction with someone new, I have to decide if I will be my full self. We all do this, to an extent, but queer people’s negotiation with authenticity must be a rapid one of safety—will this person not offer me a job if I’m gay? If I’m out at a bar and someone finds out, will they hit me? If they notice my posture is “different” on the bus, will we sit in an awkwardness and tension for the next 20 minutes?

I do not write this to share my own personal complaints, but to offer a window so non-queer people might realize how exhausting it can be to live our lives. The gym, the store, the doctor—every one of these places can be filled with fear, but that fear can also be lessened, if not fully eliminated, through visible action like flags, and allies willing to step up when something is not right.

Federal government aside, life has been getting better for gay people in most of the world this century. Dozens of countries still don’t allow gay marriage and violence against queer people occurs everywhere, but as we see some improvement, we must say there is still a long way to go and no defined end point. We need allies now more than ever—the fight is ongoing, we’re still in your lives, and there is more to do than allow or preserve marriage. We must defend it, yes, but allies, your presence, your openness, not shying away from conversations are all necessary.

This was never about one flag or even one town. This is about respecting your neighbor.

Councilors Cahill, Wright, and Wagner, I must question whether you respect the LGBTQ+ community and that on its own is concerning, but more than that, your willingness to so quickly react, a luxury for citizens, but not something politicians should typically engage in, makes me wonder what your commitment is to any given citizen’s wellbeing and your general approach to governance.

Our community faces dozens of issues and you took the time to vote on this one.

Reports indicate Councilor Wright called the situation and reactions “unavoidable,” yet it was the three councilor’s actions, against the voice of the majority of the community, that has caused fear and hurt.

You represent people at one of the closest levels in our system. Today you left behind LGBTQ+ people. Which group is next?

Congrats on 250 America. Democracy is still—mostly—alive. Let’s use it to lift each other up rather than whatever this charade is in Webster.

There are dozens of ways you can support the local LGBTQ+ community. In addition to speaking out and up in your day to day and defending people when needed, you can also check out Rochester LGBT+ Together’s directory of local organizations and contribute to their mutual aid funds which go directly to people in our community in immediate need.

Kyle Rosenthal

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